Monday, 15 June 2015

Writing Portfolio Sample

WALT: To select word carefully to impact our audience.

  • Have I used descriptive verb?
  • Have I used precise nouns?
  • Have I added adjectives to describe some nouns 
  • Have I used adverbs to tell the reader How? When? Where?

Big Idea:
Here is my story.

Ahhhhh!!!!!! I'm in the sky wait I'm not that high!!! They are all casing me.
 Ow that really hurt, why do they bounce me I'm not supposed to be bounce me. It feels like I'm dead because they chuck me all the time. They chuck me hand to hand and hand to a sweaty hand Yuck. Sometimes I glide. Maybe its not so bad being a netball after all.

Feedback/Feedforward: Wow Sophie I think you did really well but I think you could work on adding a bit more detail.

Evaluation: I think I could improve on adding a bit more detail to my story but other wise a think I did well.

1 comment:

  1. I can imagine how gross it would be being a netball, passed between 'sweaty' hands. This was a good describing word to add impact for the reader.

    I wonder if you would add more detail to your writing and what you would add? Perhaps some words to describe the feeling of flying high in the air?