The Night and Morning For A Parent At Camp
When I wake up I hear the cabin next door screaming, I wonder what happened so I look at the clock and it’s only 3pm and I have to help the children if something is wrong I have to help the girls. I creep & crawl into the cabin 3 and I see all these touches on and all the girls are out of bed and there all having a dance party until they see me & they all go back to sleep apart from one girl she is still dancing, “She’s I wonder what all the girls are doing, they just fell asleep and they said that they weren’t tired. In my head I think who is still dancing and the only bed that is free is Sasha. She has glasses and there on the floor, by her bed so she can’t see me and I’m being quiet some she can’t hear me ether. I go up to Sasha and put her back to bed and Sasha started snoring so I went back to bed.
Ding Ding!!! My alarm goes of and we have to go wake up the girls. Last night when the girls in cabin 1 went to bed we put whipped cream on there and hand & where going to tickle the girls face and they will wipe their face and it will go all over them. First Elly goes and tickles Olivia and she almost wipes her face but the cream was to heavy so Olivia released the cream. The next girl had no cream on her hand because she woke up in the night and went to the bathroom and washes it of. All of the other girls did the same thing as Olivia all apart from Yassmine she got the whipped cream all over her face. She is the deepest darkest sleeper in the world. At least that was funny!!! I walk into cabin 3 and the girls that were having a disco and nobody is in there, they all having a shower except Sasha. Sasha is sleep dancing. I just shake my head and walk out. Sasha will find out sooner or later.
Feedback/Feedfoward: Well done Sophie you did a really good job but next time you could used more alteration and more detail- Aria
Evaluation: I think I did a good story because I used nouns and smiles but next time I think I could add more alteration.